MD Anderson

Just now I am sitting at MD Anderson for my umpteenth visit. This time it involves surgical follow-up after having a prosthetic device implanted supporting my left vocal chord. It had become paralyzed due to two nasty battles of nazo-pharynx cancer since the spring of 2003. The new year begins tomorrow and I am reflecting upon this one just ending. In February I was ordained and installed as pastor for First Presbyterian Church in Waskom Texas; a small but lovely community on interstate 20 about 3 hours east of Dallas. They called me to be their minister even though I had just finished a second cancer battle. Some might think they were desperate, others might recon them gutsy but I just think the Lord had a plan in mind for them and for me.

I watch as young and old come and go from one room or area to another in this massive, sprawling medical mall of ministry. I am struck by the fact that some I see will survive while others will succumb to their disease and cease living here on the planet. My heart goes out to all of them and sometimes I want to shout out "look to Christ - look to his cross, where he died for you and for me!" I wonder how many of them know Jesus savingly. I wonder why I am not asking more that question.

It seems to me that Christians don't really appreciate or understand the value of their redemption as we ought to. If I were on death row awaiting my execution and there found a way to leave my cell and walk out a free man and I had the answer to the questions so that all others could likewise be liberated then what would prevent me from sharing? Perhaps it is a fear of being ostracised or that "my truth" would be flat out rejected not being "their truth" or that I would not be taken seriously or some such thing.

Yet I have been released from that cell. I have done violence to God's laws and to his person in open rebellion against the one that loved me and died for me. And now he has freed me, cleared me and expunged my devious record of high treason; made me to be his child by adopting me and calling me son.

Make me, Lord, your ambassador. Make me faithful, honest and forthright in all my relationships so that as I meet some in life's journey that do not know you, I would be willing to point them to the First Things; the cross, the Christ, the empty tomb, the throne in heaven and to Him that sits there ever interceding for us. God grant me the grace to do so.